Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

operation "beaches make me wet" is a go

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(904): View more from Florida

You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.

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(765): View more from Indiana

well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.

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(708): View more from Illinois

she fell through a window trying to flash someone

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(847): View more from Illinois

looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!

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(915): View more from Texas

It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!

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(425): View more from Washington

In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining

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