I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
