Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
