Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
