Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
