I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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