I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
