her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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