well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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