Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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