My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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