He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
