ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize