i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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