Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
