It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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