South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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