she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
