Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
