i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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