Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
