last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
