Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He shit in the fireplace
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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