btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
