i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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