dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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