Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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