i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
well you can't waste a boner
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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