out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
