ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
