I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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