Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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