Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
