Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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