It's Friday. Sex?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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