What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
The beer is more important than you right now.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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