does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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