Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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