That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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