hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
