After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
