she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
This house was built for laser tag.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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