So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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