I just pynch a tree in the face
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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