It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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