Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
