Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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