): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
only if we run a train.
done.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
