I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
