I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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